"If you still have questions about whether or not excessive pressure and a narrow version of success are truly harming our children, The Self-Driven Child is an absolute must-read. While most books on the impact of stress on child development offer anecdotes and clinical examples, Stixrud and Johnson make it clear that it is now research that explains why kids don’t thrive under our current priorities. A healthy child needs a healthy brain.  Not only do they produce the evidence that shows why unremitting achievement pressure is toxic to our children, they also show us what the alternative would look like.  It is not an overstatement to say that this is one of the most radical and important books on raising healthy, resilient, purpose-driven kids." —Madeline Levine, PhD., author of The Price of Privilege and Teach Your Children Well
 
"Compelling, revolutionary, and wise, The Self-Driven Child empowers parents with the courage, the tools, and the mindset to reduce toxic stress, and to foster our child’s capacity for resilience, success, and optimal development. Its message—that we should trust kids to have more control over their own lives—is one every parent needs to hear." —Tina Payne Bryson, PhD, co-author of The Whole Brain Child and The Yes Brain

 “Sometimes the most helpful thing we can do as parents is to parent our children a little less. This humane, thoughtful book turns the latest brain science into valuable practical advice for parents on how to pull back, when to engage and when to let go. Read it. Your children will thank you.” —Paul Tough, New York Times bestselling author of How Children Succeed

“This serious and probing look at how to give our children the right kinds of independence shows us how much power we have to ensure they can function optimally.  It is a book about how to make our children more meaningfully independent, and to set ourselves free in the process.” —Andrew Solomon, author of Far from the Tree

"While being a parent was never easy, these days parents face a raft of new challenges. For legions of young people, the pressures of competition in school can drain the pleasure from learning and create unbearable strains at home. Fold in the 24/7 clamor of social media and the unpredictable dynamics of digital culture and the net result is a toxic mix of stress and anxiety that's damaging young people in the present and seriously threatening their futures. So what are parents to do? The wise advice of this important and timely book is to loosen the reins and step back. In trying too hard to control their children, too often parents have unwittingly become part of the problem they're trying to solve. Combining deep insights from clinical practice and educational coaching, Stixrud and Johnson have written a penetrating account of the chronic problems that many families now face and an incisive, practical guide to what parents can do to relieve them. You may find their arguments surprising and their prescriptions counterintuitive. That's all the more reason to read them closely and take them seriously. They are rooted in serious science, a compassionate humanity and compelling evidence of the power of young people to live their best lives if we let them. An essential book for parents and educators everywhere." —Sir Ken Robinson PhD, Educator and New York Times Best Selling Author, Creative Schools
 
"The Self-Driven Child will guide parents to the sweet spot between helicopter and hands-off parenting. Stixrud and Johnson ground their clear and practical advice in cutting-edge research and years of experience working with young kids and teens. An invaluable resource for the thinking parent." —Lisa Damour, PhD,  author of Untangled

"A battleplan to attack the anxiety that's devouring kids and decimating their native potential, this extraordinary book shines a light into the darkness of test dread, chronic sleeplessness, 24/7 social-media 'beauty pageants' and the full array of stress-induced forces that undermine children. But Stixrud and Johnson do more than identify the demons -- they slay them. Read this incisive, witty, deeply-researched book and help your child bend toward the sunlight of learning and self-directed joy. A must read." —Ron Suskind, Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and author of Life, Animated

“Stixrud and Johnson combine science and compassion to make the case that parental over-control is eroding our kids’ confidence, competence and mental health. Accessible, compelling and richly researched, The Self Driven Child reveals the clear links between the stresses of competitive schooling and the anxiety and depression that are so widespread in kids today. This urgently-needed book has the potential to revolutionize the way we parent.” —Judith Warner, author of A Perfect Madness: Motherhood in the Age of Anxiety

“As parents we wonder, 'How can I help my kids learn to make good decisions?'  This lucidly written, deeply insightful, and highly engaging book—the best parenting book I’ve read in a long time—takes the mystery out of that process.  All the chapters—on why a sense of control is so important for kids, how to help kids develop their inner drive, the need to tame technology, and how you can teach even young children to understand and influence the working of their brain—give you the science behind the authors’ recommendations and action steps you can immediately take in your family.  We learn what good guidance looks like: how to help kids make thoughtful choices, handle stress, and grow in confidence that they can positively affect the course of their lives.  As Stixrud and Johnson make crystal clear, raising a 'self-driven' child doesn’t mean doing less as a parent; it actually means doing more—but in a collaborative, mutually respectful relationship that’s more rewarding for both parent and child.  You’ll still be a critically important authority figure, but also a consultant who asks questions like 'What’s your Plan B if Plan A doesn’t work out?'  You’ll be a parent who helps your child develop what the Greeks considered the master virtue: good judgment. That’s a gift that will last a lifetime. “ —Thomas Lickona, Ph.D., author of Character Matters and How to Raise Kind Kids

“A nuanced and enormously insightful look into the struggles facing so many children and teens… A wonderful resource for contemporary parenting, this title should knock less relevant child-raising guides right off the shelf.” —Booklist
 
"Stixrud and Johnson provide compassionate, well-supported suggestions and strategies for parents to help their kids deal with ever-more-competitive academics and extracurriculars. The authors make a highly persuasive case for how parents can help their children segue from feeling stressed and powerless to feeling loved, trusted, and supported." —Publishers Weekly