Introduction 3
Chapter 1 Danny Dunn and the Homework Machine 13
1.1 The Pedagogical Mask 15
1.2 Kid-Shaped Capital 21
1.3 Risky Child-Rearing 26
1.4 Helicopter Parents, Vigilante Moms, and Zero Tolerance 32
1.5 Xtremely Sad Teens 38
1.6 I Guess This Is Growing Up 40
Chapter 2 Go to College 42
2.1 The Average Student 43
2.2 Anyone Can Afford a Brand-New Diploma 46
2.3 Why Is College So Expensive? 49
2.4 Failing Reform School 58
2.5 When Is a Default Not a Default? 61
2.6 The Student Debt Time Machine 63
Chapter 3 Work (Sucks) 66
3.1 The Changing Character of Work 69
3.2 Getting Paid 71
3.3 Polarization 75
3.4 The Feminization of Labor 78
3.5 Precarity 82
3.6 Nice Work If You Can Get It 85
3.7 Deunionization 89
3.8 Just Get an Intern 91
3.9 Owners and Profiteers 96
Chapter 4 The Feds 104
4.1 Not-So-Entitled Millennial 107
4.2 The Juvenilization of Poverty 110
4.3 Left Behind in the Race to the Top 114
4.4 Cops 120
4.5 Pens 125
4.6 Murderers 129
Chapter 5 Everybody Is a Star 131
5.1 Post-Soviet Training 133
5.2 Trophies and Moneyball 136
5.3 Big Workers on Campus 140
5.4 Toddlers in Tiaras 147
5.5 The Birth of Tweens 153
5.6 YouTube and Fruity Loops 156
Chapter 6 Behavior Modification 164
6.1 Bad Brains 166
6.2 Pills 173
6.3 Social Media 177
6.4 Good Habits 188
6.5 Porn 195
Conclusion 199
Seven Signs of the Bad Future 200
1. Human Capital Contracts 201
2. Professionalization of Childhood 202
3. Climate Privilege 203
4. Discrimination by Algorithm 204
5. The Malfunctioning 206
6. Misogynist Backlash 207
7. Fully Tracked 208
Bop It Solutions 210
Buy It! 212
Vote It! 215
Give It 219
Protest It! 222
Put It Down! 225
Final Word 227
Acknowledgments 231
Notes 233
Graph Credits 249
Index 251